Since I met my friend, her huge theme was “life.” She believed that she die soon. She wanted to be remembered. She hates loneliness. I stayed her apartment all the time. I hate loneliness too.
When I talked with my friend few days ago, she was struggling with her biggest theme “life.”
“Why am I living?”
“What is the meaning of my life?”
Her questions to herself were really bitter to me. Not much people wondering about their life, or they forget about their wondrous while they are living in this beautiful but tough life. However she has never forgotten about her straggling and curiosity. Over ten years of straggle, it became bit heavier to me.
She is a student of University. She always found or made answer to those exams. Now where she can find the answer?
“You know what, how come are you not going to look for the meaning of your life? It’s all up to you. If you don’t have something you can put your effort on or dream on, you can find and try.”
I do not have answer.
Also what I want to tell her is…
“In case if suddenly you are gone, my watch of you will stop in me, and that cause my perfect body and mental balance as loosened. The watch won’t be able to tic-tac again, just I’ll have the watch in my chest pocket until the day I see you.”
It won’t change train schedule, opening coffee shop, and stray walking cat that I disappear from here, but you will notice and cry for me. Then I don’t need 32,000 people cry for me, only I may concern is that I want to you to smile again.
I guess this is my answer.